Shut him up
by ClassyRainbowAristocrat
Summary: Kankri is rambling, as always, when Cronus has the perfect idea to shut the troll up. Rated M for badly written CroKan oneshot request


**Request for Leopardtail**

**I tried to make it have somewhat of a plot but I accidentally porn. Also, I don't know how to write dirty talk so just keep that in mind :[**

**Warnings: Sex. Dirty talk. Sex.**

He always does this. He'll keep you cooped up in this damn room and yap endlessly about shit you don't give two fucks about. He speaks with a formal voice and pretends that it is a discussion and not an actual fucking lecture. He asks if you feel triggered, and sometimes you wonder if the guy even knows what the fuck a trigger is. On and on, he drones, it's like watching a record player spin on an infinite record, except it just loops. All you hear coming out of his mouth is "6lah 6lah 6lah 6lah 6laaaah." Over and over again. You find yourself kind of spacing out into your own little world. You would think after millions of fucking sweeps the kid would give it a rest, but time is no limit for Kankri. Instead of listening, you nod your head occasionally for a while, before you are so out of it, you don't even think of responding. You doubt he's even paying attention to you, anyhow. You watch his smooth, black lips, fantasizing about forcing yours against his. You ignore the fact that if you _were_ stupidly brave enough to attempt that, Kankri would smack the everloving fuck outta you. So you play it cool and just let your mind wander to darker, much more lewd places than this particular dream bubble.

You found your eyes wandering down to those yummy legs, tight pants showing everything off just the way you wanted. Every time he moved, turned slightly away, you would bite your lip as you caught a glimpse of that delicious ass. What you wouldn't do just give it a firm squueze.

"So as you can see, I- Cronus, are you even listening to me?" Kankri sighs tiredly when you blink twice and look up. "Wvhat?" He shakes his head. "I knew you weren't listening. Honestly, why do I even bother? And you know, it is extremely rude and offensive to people when you ignore them, the least you could have done to avoid this awkward predicament would have been to tell me you were not too interested in this subject and I would have moved to another to discuss-" You bite the inside of your cheek to ease the annoyance at his rambling. You stand up rather quickly, startling him. He recoils back into his chair, shoulders hunched and white, pupil-less eyes wide.

"Wvould it kill ya to can it for fivwe minutes, Kan?" You say lowly, face a little too close to his liking. You can tell he's uncomfortable, but it's not like you really care, anyways. "You're pretty cute wvhen you aren't yapping to Beforus an' back." You chuckle, a hand cupping his cheek. Sure, you didn't really have a justifiable reason to be touching him or act so suggestive, but did you really need a reason? You didn't really think so. He looks like he wants to say something but can't find the words, already blushing just from your hand touching his face. You quirk your eyebrow, silently questioning. He obviously isn't going to speak up any time soon, so in the mean time, you rub little circles into his soft cheek and inch your lips closer to his. You wonder if they are just as plush and lovely as you imagined. Just before they touched, he inhales shakily before stammering.

"C-Cronus, I am going to have to ask you to please refrain from touching me, as it makes me uncomfortable. Any form of contact of this manner is inappropriate and very against my vow of celibacy-"

You roll your eyes. "Shut up." you say, pressing your lips against his. He makes this little noise between the kiss that sounds like a whine of protest and confusion. Despite all his fussing, he presses his lips gingerly against yours. This surprises you, but not by much. His lips were soft, unbelievably soft. You didn't think, not even in a million sweeps, that you could ever kiss the mutant blooded troll. Yet here you are. Smooching it up. Part of you thinks that he did this on purpose. The way he talked on and on about pailing on Beforus and the embarassingly degrading system in which the adult troll was forced into it in order to survive yadda yadda had to have been enough to make you a little fidgety, and oh, how he droned. He was practically begging to be shut up. Yes. This was exactly what he wanted. It may not have been exactly today he planned it, but you are certain that Kankri has wanted this for a long time, why else would he let you kiss him and even go so far as to kiss back? You had him all figured out, and are feeling rather proud of it.

"Cr-Cronusssss." He whines when you pull away, not even trying to be subtle about your hand snaking up his thigh. You smile against the skin of his neck after pushing away a part of his red sweater, breathing deliberately on it. He shivers from it, you suppose that his neck is a very sensitive area. To further test the idea, you nip his neck, earning a nice little gasp from Kankri. "So, this is wvhat I havwe to do just to get you to shut up, huh?" You laugh, glancing up at his face and taking note of his bright red hue. He doesn't respond, he just kind of moves his hips in a weird way that tells you he wants more contact. "Wvho wvoulda though you wvere so eager for this kind of attention." You continue to tease him, hoping to get a rise out of him. He just closes his eyes and has this expression of mixed arousal and guilt.

You're running your hands under his shirt, cold hands only making him shudder evermore. He leans up into your touch, and wow, this is actually really arousing. He complains that your hands are too cold, making you smash your lips back against his. "I only wvanna hear moans and begging outta you, lovwe." You breathe out huskily into his ear before making a trail of licks on his neck. He seems to be going crazy over that, so you further your actions by nipping and sucking. He kept repeating your name, over and over, almost like a chant of lust. "You're already so hot, an' I'm just gettin' started, dollface."

"What brought this on all of a sudden?" He asks, and you just smirk. "I'vwe been wanting this for some time, babe, and from the looks of things, so have you." You pinch his nipples watching his face change into the most angelic expression of pleasure. "Th-that's absurd! I'm celibate, I, in no way, even remotely thought about this-" You pinch harder, making him break off his sentence and cry out helplessly. "Yet, here wve are."

He tries to give you a chastising look, but you can see him faltering, you can tell you've won this battle long ago. "Touche." Is all he manages out while you tug his shirt up. He lets you, a pout on his face all the while that makes you laugh at his cute attempt to show his is disapproving and reluctant, but the moment your hands feel his creamy grey skin again, the pout melts into a submissive, sexy expression. He purrs at your mouth eagerly wrapping around one of his already hard nipples, hand tangling in your hair like it was the only thing he could hold onto so he wouldn't fall through the fucking floor. His moans alone egged you on, not to mention his cute little hip rolls, which you encouraged with your own clothed bulge grinding against him.

"Wvhat next?" you ask, wanting to hear him tell you what to do. He is hesitant, apparently still holding on to a shred of his dignity. You were going to change that. You thrust roughly against him, making him choke out a surprised cry. "Tell me wvhat you wvant, dear, be descriptivwe, nowv, I like details." He whines, stubborn little shit. You bite down on his shoulder, hard enough for a mark, earning another intoxicating moan. "Cr-Cronus!" But that's not what you want to hear, you want him to beg, and he knows it. "Don't you dare leave a maaaark." He continues to whimper, before you roll your eyes. You decide to help him out with this a bit, so you swoop down to his ear and whisper "Do you want my bulge up your nook? Or do you want me to suck you off, first?" His cheeks deepened in its red hue, stammering and rambling nonsense. "The last one..." He says. This won;t simply do.

"Then beg me for it." You press, and for a moment, you thought he would say no, but at the rate of this situation and the rising heat, he is pushed so far as to comply. "Cro, please, I don't even care anymore, just please suck my... my bulge. Oh, dear, I'm sorry, forgive my profane language!" He proceeded to apologize while you looked at him, clearly unamused. "Look, it's supposed to be profane, that's wvhat dirty talkin' is."

"Oh... I wouldn't know, I've never, ah, done anything so inappropriate."

"Just followv my lead, 'kay?" He nods shakily, hands kneading into the chair cushion. You slink off of him, your face at the same level as his groin area. You tug at the waistband. "Howv the hell do you get into these? They're ridiculously tight. You aren't even wearing underwear underneath, are you?"

"They aren't really meant to be taken off very often, thank you very much." He says rather defensively, eyes averting yours.

After taking more time than you would have liked to get those demon pants off, you stare at the irresistible skin exposed. His bulge has been unsheathed, writhing, searching for something to wrap around. "Wvow, look at the size of this thing, nice and slimy, too." You purr, running your tongue bravely over the warm tentabulge, which wriggled over your lips. Kankri just continues to vocalize his pleasure, his hand tightening grip, pulling you closer to his bulge. "Oh, oh god- Cronus-! Please-!" He arches his hips up to meet your mouth, which you let him, considering it _is_ his first time. May as well spoil the kid. With an open mouth, you take the entire thing in, half to show off your skills, half to hear the other moan louder. You feel the tip of his bulge tickle the back of your throat while you suckle, milking a string of desperate, breathless moans and groans.

Once you get the hang of things, you prod a finger to his dripping wet nook, which he makes another hot as fuck gasp at before you push it all the way in, moving it around the warmth slowly before working a groove to match your mouth. This makes him throw his head back and cover his mouth to muffle his noisy vocalizations. Its not long before he is moving his hips to meet your finger's pattern, which is a sign for you to add another. You twist and turn them in all the ways you could possibly think of to get this guy to cry out your name in ecstasy. You don't mind the red liquids dripping from your mouth or onto your hand which was practically thrusting into him, but it was all so hot. You have half a mind to withdraw your free hand from his hip just to help feel yourself while you please him when another idea hits you.

You hum around his bulge, making his thighs quiver and you hear him say your name soooo needily. But for the sake of foreplay and making this last, you pull away just as his tone rises and his voice begins to crack while he practically screams your name to the world. He cracks open an eye, panting out "Why did you stop?" You manage to yank off your jeans eagerly, shoving your boxers down with them, as well. "Because I'm going to pound that tight little nook of yours." You say mischievously, making his face redden more than you saw possible.

"W-wait, are we really going to... to pail?" He asked nervously, getting off his chair to help undress you, kissing you on the way. "Yeah." You answer, pulling him into your hold once you are just as naked as he is. You let your bulge wrap with his for a bit, almost emulating the tango of your tongues wrapping around each other. "Is it going to hurt?"

"It's really wet dowvn there, so don't worry."

He lays back, unsure of what he should be doing. You chortle. "Spread your beautiful legs, Kankri." He seems halfhearted about it, but does as you say, and what can you say, it's one hell of a view. You place yourself on top of him, stopping only for a moment to intertwine your fingers with his, a perfectly laced handhold of trust. He buried his face into your shoulder timidly, which made your grin widen. You wasted no more time, thrusting fully into Kankri while he made the loudest, most erotic yell, yet. Every move you made from that point left him in a panting, moaning, groaning, gasping mess, it sounded like he was dying, but you still continued on, thrusting in and out at a reasonable speed. You felt his grip tighten like a vice on your hand, and you gave an assuring squeeze.

"Doesn't that feel good, doll? My bulge in your nook?"

"Y-yes! Yes! Just keep going, oh god! Don't stop, don't stop!"

You had no intention of stopping, if anything, you were going faster and harder now that you were hearing him like this. "Sh-shit." You mumbled, releasing his hand and placing it on the floor to steady yourself. He didn't seem to mind, in fact he used his hands to grapple at your back, making you hiss in slight pain and fueled your energy to pick up the pace. By the end of it, you were both bouncing wildly, groaning and moaning together while you rode yourselves out of the pleasure that you definitely needed more often. You wished for this feeling every day, as you were sure he was, too.

With a few final, rough thrusts, you finished in him, watching him finish a bit after. He laid beneath you, panting like a feral beast. You could see the glow of his orgasm, and with half lidded eyes, you leaned down and kissed his forehead softly. "Looks like I need to shut you up more often."

"I think not. Don't expect anything like this again."

"Haha, love you too, babe." You joke back sarcastically. You both dragged yourselves up and headed for his recuperacoon, where in the sopor slime you both held each other and went to sleep. Oh, you could get used to this.


End file.
